Some people recommend smiling all the time when talking, and listening to girls (so you seem friendly and confident) while on James Bond films James never smiles, and other people say smiling all the time shows insecurity. What is your take on this? I am often accused of being too serious, so smiling is out of character for me at present.
The seductive power of smiling is GREATLY under-estimated by a lot of guys, especially those who overly focused on language techniques. I’ve met many guys deep in study of complicated NLP techniques when they don’t even command their own body language. Smiling is probably the #1 initial attraction cue for a woman. Ignore it and no matter how quick-witted your tongue is, you’re fighting an uphill battle.
The reason to smile is simple. A smile shows that you’re an open, friendly, relaxed person. Even more importantly, people have a natural reaction to smile when they see you smile, making THEM feel open, friendly, and relaxed on the inside.
And it doesn’t matter whether you have a perfect smile or not. Scientific studies show that people respond to the ACT of your smile rather than how perfect or white your teeth are. The ACT of smiling is what shows you’re a friendly, open, confident person. The ACT of smiling is what triggers the good feelings in the other person.
Unfortunately, most people walk around with a rather stern look on their face and are not in the habit of smiling. Yes, it’s a learned habit not to smile and you have to reprogram yourself to be in the habit of smiling to everyone.
A great way to approach women is to look them right in the eye and give them a great big smile. Wait a full beat and then say «hi,» or your opener. The response you get will be 100% better than if you approach with a stern look.
Just as an example, last night I went to Pollo Tropical to pick up some food to eat. The young lady (she must have been about age 22) was like, «How can I help you,» with a rather beaten-down look on her face. As I approached, I gave her a big, wide smile while making eye contact and held it for a few beats. I said, «hi», which technically wasn’t a logical answer to her question.
In response she transformed and gave me a big smile back. She asked again, «How can I help you?» but enthusiastically this time. I said, «Hmm… give me the… mambo combo,» with another big smile and with a slow sexy voice while making direct eye contact.
At this point she started to giggle. I stretched out my order banter for a good five minutes (luckily no one was behind me!) just reading off the menu – no other conversation whatsoever. Smiling, eye contact and voice tonality, nothing more.
After a few minutes she was giggling and I said to her, «Hmmm… give me your number.» She said okay. And we hadn’t even exchanged a normal word of conversation with each other.
Now don’t expect to just be able to do this right off the bat, especially if you’re the solemn type. It takes dedicated PRACTICE to be able to pull off a big smile on the fly. It’s harder than it looks if you’re not use to it.
That’s why I’ve developed a set of exercises you need to perform everyday for at least 30 days to develop the smiling habit so that it comes across clean and natural. I guarantee that by mastering this one simple skill, by giving this fundamental attraction cue that women are biologically programmed to respond to, you’ll get more results than any language technique alone. The exercises are all in the latest version of Seduction Science.
Also, while you’re at it you should get yourself a copy of my new relaxed confidence audio tape series, Confidence MAX. This audio tape series of mine will make it easy for you to approach any woman anywhere, a great skill to have in order to practice your smiling.